


Scared To Prove Them Right

by DustyAttic



Series: Evak Family [5]
Category: SKAM (TV)
Genre: Eden - Freeform, F/F, Faina - Freeform, I worked really hard on this I hope you like it, Lisa - Freeform, M/M, aspen - Freeform, coming to terms with sexuality, girls loving girls
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-22
Updated: 2017-11-22
Packaged: 2019-02-05 08:05:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,050
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12790302
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DustyAttic/pseuds/DustyAttic
Summary: Isak and Even's daughter, Faina, comes to terms with her sexuality and her crush on her best friend. Overcoming fears, stereotypes, and obstacles with the help of her great dads<33This is Faina's shame.





	Scared To Prove Them Right

Faina was born in May of 2019, and Lisa was born the April before her. Lisa had long auburn hair that turned redder as she got older, and Faina had short, white blonde hair that got curlier as she got older. 

The first time Faina heard about marriage, it was because Lisa was saying her mom wasn’t married, and Faina didn’t really understand what she meant.

 

The first time Faina actually ever thought about marriage, she was only two or three, and she was asking her dads about why she didn’t have a mom. They slowly, carefully explained to her that some children had a mom and a dad, other children had two dads, others had two moms, and some, like Lisa, only had one parent. When she asked why, they explained that it just depended on the different type of ways people loved each other. When she asked about what love meant, her dad said it was how she felt in her heart when she was around them, and Lisa, and her grandparents. 

“So you love pappa like you love me?” she’d asked, leaning forward with high eyebrows. 

“Well,” Isak had said, lifting her off the couch and snuggling her close to him, “I do, but it’s also a little different. Parents love each other differently than they love they love their babies, or their parents, because they aren’t family when they first meet. They have to fall in love first.”

“So you and pappa fell in love, and then I was your baby,” Faina repeated back to him.

“That’s right, angel,” Even had said, petting her soft head. “So you have two dads.”

“And no mom,” the little girl had said. 

“And no mom. But that’s okay, right?” Isak asked, kissing her nose.

Smiling, Faina had nodded. “That’s okay. I like having you and pappa.”

“Aw, baby,” Even said, reaching over and lifting her off of Isak’s hip. 

“So why did you and dada get married?” Faina asked, looking down at him with wide eyes. “You were already in love. I thought you told me people get married when they fall in love.”

“Well, it doesn’t really matter when you get married, sweetheart, or if you even get married. As long as, if you do decide to get married, you marry somebody you really love,” Even said, brushing back her soft hair. 

“Will I marry a boy? Since you both married boys?” she’d asked next, looking between them, and both boys had laughed softly. 

“You can marry whoever you want, baby girl,” Even said, leaning forward to kiss her head. “A girl or a boy or whoever.”

“Okay,” Faina nodded. And then Lisa’s mom, Viola, had rung their doorbell and she’d squeaked excitedly and wiggled out of Even’s arms, eager to start her playdate. 

 

The second time Faina seriously thought about marriage was when she and Lisa were playing wedding, when they were maybe seven. Faina was in her white dress and one of Lisa’s teddy bears was the groom and Lisa was voicing him. After the game, they’d been sitting on Lisa’s bed, staring at the ceiling. 

“Do you wanna get married?” Lisa had asked, red hair splayed under her head. 

“Yeah. Don’t you?” Faina had asked, rolling over to get a better look at her. 

“I think,” Lisa had shrugged. “Mama’s not married. Some kids at school think that’s bad.”

“Some kids think my dads are bad, too,” Faina had nodded. “That there shouldn’t be two boys who are married.”

“Do you think you’re gonna marry a boy, or a girl?” Lisa asked, sitting up slightly. “Some of the kids at school think that you’re gonna marry and girl and I’m never gonna get married because of our parents.”

“That’s dumb,” Faina had said, scrunching up her eyebrows. She said it a little to make Lisa feel better, who clearly didn’t like the idea that she would never marry. But she also said it because she’d heard other kids saying her dads were going to turn her gay, too, and she was worried of what would happen if they were right. 

 

She was nine the first time she saw Lisa holding hands with a boy. She didn’t know who the boy was or when he’d even met Lisa, but somehow they was over there, holding hands, when Lisa was supposed to be looking for Faina during their game of hide-and-seek.

Angry- she told herself it was because Lisa had forgotten about their game- she stormed off to the other side of the park and hid. And hid and hid and hid. Finally, the sun started to set, and she started to think maybe they’d all forgotten about her. So she stood up from where she’d crammed herself behind a thick wall of bushes, which were pretty far away from the playground. And she looked around for the bench where Isak and Even had been sitting, but they weren’t there. And it started. 

First, her palms broke into a cold sweat and her legs got all wobbly. Then it felt like somebody had pushed all the breath out of her body, so she started taking shakey inhales and choking out exhales, tottering towards the bench. She was freezing all over and felt like she might be sick, but mostly she was just so, so scared. She tried to call out for anyone, but her voice wasn’t working, and then she felt a pair of strong arms scoop her up and Even was holding her like he’d never let her go. 

“Where were you, baby?! Oh my god, oh my god we thought somebody’d taken you, oh my god. You cannot run off like that! I mean, you know the rules, Faina, and we- oh my god, oh my god, Jesus Christ,” he was rambling in her ear, and even though he was holding her she still couldn’t breathe and she didn’t know how to tell him. So she just cried and cried, chest painfully tight, and Even assumed it was because she’d been scared of being lost, not that she’d been so scared that her body had attacked her. 

When she got home and finally explained what happened, they took her to a doctor. 

He said she had panic disorder, at which Isak pursed his lips and looked down at his lap, so angry at himself for giving her this pain. Faina thought it was because she’d disappointed him. And she connected her feelings about Lisa holding hands with that boy to the way Isak hid her face in Even’s chest after they got home and he thought she wasn’t looking.

Two days later, Lisa came over and gave her the biggest hug and started saying over and over again how scared she’d been. And Faina forgave her. 

 

By the time she was ten, Faina had seen enough TV and movies- 13 Reasons Why, Naomi and Ely's No Kiss List, Modern Family- that she knew something about children of same-sex parents turning out to be LGBT was damaging. That the idea that gay parents turned their children gay was perpetuated and painful and, when same-sex couples did raise LGBT kids, this only reinforced the stereotype, and gave a backbone to the argument that same-sex couples shouldn’t have children. Which was why Faina decided that she was not going to be gay. She never said it outloud, because she could sense that something about that sentence would break her dads’ hearts, but she knew that her being gay would hurt them, in the long run, even more. That the amount of people who would hate on them and their family would go from bearable to unbearable. And she couldn’t do it to Eden and Aspen, either- couldn’t be the one who made the teasing they got go from mild to pretty hard to deal with. 

She knew that she was probably overanalyzing this, but that was what she’d always done. Overanalyzed. For as long as she could really remember, she had thought everything to death, until her head was spinning and she was about to cry. Her pappa said she got it from Isak, and, just like when she was awake at three in the morning or having a panic attack, she would always go to Isak when her brain wouldn’t let her breath, and he would hold her until she felt okay again. But, with this, she couldn’t go to Isak, and she couldn’t really go to anyone, and she couldn’t give up on that fairytale, prince and princess dream, even though she knew it would hurt her dads if she told them and the last thing she ever wanted to do was hurt them, or anyone in the LGBT community. So she didn’t say it outloud. Just let it sit in the bottom of her stomach like a rock while she thought, over and over, that this would be a lot harder if she were actually gay. And how lucky she was to be straight.

At Julian’s, Lisa’s little brother’s, twelfth birthday party, Lisa brought her boyfriend, a boy from her school that Faina had never met before but had heard a lot about. They were thirteen and he was fourteen and he had an ugly way of smiling at Lisa. Faina took a deep breath when she introduced herself to him, and told herself that she only felt so weird because Lisa was her best friend and she didn’t want her to get hurt. The boy said he was called Anders, and that he liked her shirt, and she didn’t know why he kept staring at it, until she did. She didn’t say anything to Lisa, because Lisa seemed so happy, and then, after the party, she saw them kiss for about 0.02 seconds by the coat closet, and she felt anger flare up in her stomach like something real and painful. When Lisa came over to grab her arm a few minutes later, she pulled it away and said she had to go, she could hang out with Anders, and then walked home trying not to cry. When she got home, she yelled at Eden for something stupid, and Isak yelled at her for yelling at him, and she screamed at them to leave her alone and locked herself in her bedroom and screamed into her pillow. Because she didn’t want these stupid, painful feelings, and she didn’t want this stupid, painful brain, and, mostly she just wanted Lisa to look at her the way she’d looked at that boy. 

 

When they were fourteen, Faina realized that maybe she didn’t need Lisa to look at her like that, and that maybe those feelings hadn’t been what she thought they were, because suddenly there was this boy, this pretty, dark haired boy at her school, and he smiled with his tongue against his teeth and his eyes all scrunched up and his hair always fell into his eyes when he laughed. His name was Mateo and he was smart and funny and mostly just kind, deeply kind and caring and he really seemed to like Faina. So, when he took her hand by her locker and leaned down and kissed her, jittery with nerves, and every happy feeling Faina had ever had bubbled up into her chest, she decided to forget about the way Lisa made her feel sometimes, because it wasn’t real anyway. 

Mateo started holding her hand all the time, and Faina was so, so happy. Sometimes, they would just sit around together, doing nothing, and he would kiss the side of her head, and she decided that this was what love felt like. Eva asked her for every detail and she and Noora and Eskild would swoon as she shyly described all the different ways he made her heart smile. Isak and Even liked Mateo, too, even though they were nervous about Faina dating somebody. When she tried to tell Lisa about him, the red haired girl would change the subject. Anders had broken up with her months before, so Faina understood that she didn’t want to hear about her lovelife, so she stopped bringing Mateo up around Lisa. And she stopped hanging around Lisa so much. She didn’t like the way his name made her frown. 

Mateo moved back to Spain with his dad when he was fifteen and Faina was still fourteen. When he left, she felt like she would never be happy again. Lisa tried to make her feel better, but it was somehow worse when Lisa was around. All she could think about was all those plays they’d put on when she was younger, when Lisa would write out a script because she was always the writer and then she would perform it, even though she wasn’t a performer, because Faina wanted to be an actress, and Lisa would always do anything for Faina. The thought that the girl who’d always done anything for Faina was now comforting her over the boy who she’d replaced Lisa with made her feel sick. And the amount of comfort that she actually got from Lisa’s warm, familiar hands smoothing back her hair felt too much not like friendship, and that made Faina feel sick, too. 

She did get happy again, without Mateo. She got happy going out with Lisa for lunch, and hanging around her other friends at school, and playing around with her little brothers and her dads, who were the best dads ever. She was really, really happy, even though there were obstacles and pain, because she had this beautiful family and these beautiful friends and she loved her life. But sometimes things got bad again. 

Tonight was a bad night.

She was fifteen, laying in bed. She’d been laying in bed for four hours, and she hated it. It was nearing two and she had to be up at six for school, so if she didn’t fall asleep now she’d be fucked for her test tomorrow and fucked for her uni applications and fucked for life. 

Outside, it started raining harder. She rolled over again, trying to push away the feeling of panic. The room was so dark it was suffocating, but if she turned on a light she’d never fall asleep and everything would be ruined. 

The blanket was too hot so she pushed it to the ground, now in only her sweatpants and a camisole. She felt fragile and gross. She wanted to get up and run until she couldn’t stand anymore.

Instead, she shut her eyes tighter and counted backwards from one thousand. Today, Lisa had been making out with a boy before class at Nissen, head tilted sideways to let him grip the side of her face. When Faina had walked in with Anne and Karoline, all of them giggling about something, Lisa had ripped herself away from the boy, a flush spreading over her entire body. Anne and Karoline had stopped and dropped their jaws before they started laughing, but Faina had looked down at her feet and tried to justify the way so much heartbreak was welling up in her chest. 

Karoline and Anne teased Lisa for the rest of the day, and told the fifth member of their group, Laila, who was Sana’s niece, and they all laughed about it at lunch. Faina felt the way Lisa watched her while she didn’t laugh with them, but she couldn’t make herself pretend because something about seeing that boy with his hands all over her had made her heart crumble just a little bit more. 

 

At 2:34, she finally passed out into a fitful sleep. She was just so exhausted. 

It didn’t last long.

At 3:22, her body tensed up and the dream she was having took a turn for the worse. 

Before, she’d been dreaming of nothing in particular, but then she and Lisa were at a park, but it was nighttime and she couldn’t tell Lisa that something bad was coming up behind her because her voice wasn’t working and she couldn’t breathe. It was cold and dark and the air was being crushed out of her body and she was failing. And then, just as the bad thing was about to pounce on Lisa, something pounced on her instead.

At 3:24, she bolted upright in bed, eyes snapping open, all the breath leaving her lungs in one painful exhale.

The room was still way too dark, except now she was actually suffocating. She couldn’t speak. Couldn’t think. Couldn’t breathe.

The panic was overwhelming. I’m going to die, I’m about to die, she thought, pounding one hand into the wall next to her as she choked on the air. There were white spots in front of her eyes. She heard Eden start to move around in the room next door, so she hit the wall harder and tried to focus on counting her breaths as well as she could, even though there were tears running down her face and pooling at her chin. She pressed both hands to her chest. The pain there was so crushing she thought she might collapse from it. 

“What are you doing?” she heard suddenly as Eden opened her door, walking in as he rubbed one eye. But then he looked at her and his hand fell from his face. “Oh. Oh, uh- dad! Pappa!” 

He took off down the hall and all Faina could think was that this must be what it felt like to be in one of those ancient boobie traps where the walls crush you to death. 

Her hearing turned into nothing but a long steady ringing and her vision started going blurry as she saw her dads turn the corner and come sprinting into her bedroom, panic written clear on their faces. Two strong arms went under her legs and she wrapped shaking arms around Even’s neck, trying to curl up as small as possible to make the hurt not so big. 

The ringing was getting louder as Even put her down on the couch, pulling her hair away from her face and saying something she couldn’t understand. His face looked all messed up and her adrenaline was sky high and she wanted to lay down and have all this go away for a long time. 

Isak ran over with a paper bag, pressing its edges to her mouth, and she knew this was to get more CO2 in her system but she also knew she felt like her body was about to implode. She saw Eden and Aspen lingering in the hall, watching her with wide, little kid eyes. She didn't like scaring them. She didn’t like scaring her whole house at 3:30 in the morning. The bag was making her face hot and sticky and the pain was becoming blinding, dizzying, so she closed her eyes and doubled over, plugging her nose and praying that if she just ignored everything, she would feel okay again.

Ten minutes passed. 

“Breathe, baby, just breathe,” she finally heard pappa whispering, felt his comforting hand on her back. Her dad kept the bag to her face. 

“You’re doing so great, angel. You’re doing so great.”

Twenty minutes passed.

Then thirty, forty.

By 4:30 in the morning, she was breathing normally again, bag still plastered over her mouth. She could see and hear and think clearly. And she knew she had to get the bag away right now because she was going to be sick. 

Standing up and stumbling towards the kitchen, she hit the edge of the sink hard and gagged up everything she’d eaten the day before, throat burning with it. 

Everyone watching her and she knew it, and then there was a cool washcloth and the back of her neck and somebody was tying back her hair. By the time she was done, her body was so exhausted that she could barely stand. And she was humiliated. 

She couldn’t make herself turn away from the sink, tears running down her cheeks like a pitiful mess. Then Isak put one hand on her shoulder and nudged her around to face him, so she shut her eyes and buried her face in his chest, trembling. Even came up behind them and wrapped her up in warmth and all she could think was what a burden she was. 

They stood like that for a while. Finally, her dad took one of her hands and lead her towards their bedroom. “Here, baby girl,” he said softly, handing her a breath mint. Then he turned to their doorway, where her brothers were hovering. “Aspen, go get her fresh clothes, sweetheart.”

“Mkay,” Aspen said quietly, looking at her with wide eyes. He backed away and turned towards her room. 

Even turned on the air conditioner, even though it was October, and got out fresh pillows and blankets, arranging them around her like she was a queen. Aspen walked back in with a pair of athletic shorts and a tshirt. 

“Here,” he said, laying them at the foot of the bed. “Are you okay?”

The fear in his voice hurt her. They’d never seen her this bad before and now she’d scared them, and what type of sister did that?

“I’m fine,” she said, trying to smile. 

Aspen blinked green eyes, looking away. Then he crawled into bed and sat next to her, wrapping her in a tight, scared hug. Faina let out a breath and hugged him back, heart pounding through her shirt. She felt Eden get in bed, too, and then he joined their hug. 

When they pulled apart, the boys still looked scared, so she tried harder to smile and said, “I’m fine. Go back to bed, okay?”

Slowly, Aspen nodded, climbing down and walking towards the door. Eden followed silently. 

Her dads walked out of the room, too, giving her privacy to change. After a few minutes, they knocked again, but she couldn’t find the words to tell them to come back, so she layed down and pretended to be asleep. 

The next morning, she woke up in bed with her dad. The house was quiet. 

Rolling over, she checked their clock. It was almost nine. They must’ve called her in sick. 

Faina stood and left the room as quietly as she could. Even and the twins were gone. 

In her room, she took out a pair of sweatpants and a sweater, pulling them on over what she was already wearing. Then she put on a pair of fuzzy socks fixed her bun. 

Walking out into the living room, she grabbed a blanket, sat on the couch, and put on the TV quietly. After a few minutes, she got up again and made herself tea. 

At 9:30, Isak came out and sat next to her. 

“How are you feeling, angel?”

She sighed, didn’t take her eyes off the TV. “I’m fine.”

She felt her dad shift closer to her. “Baby?” 

It was too much to look at him, so she looked down. 

“Baby, we think you should go see a therapist.”

And her whole body seized up. “No.”

“Baby, pappa goes to a therapist and it helps him a lot-”

“I know, and that’s great, but it won’t help me,” she said, gritting her teeth so that she wouldn’t start crying all over again. 

“How do you know if you never try, sweet girl?” Isak asked, brushing back some of her hair. She flinched away. 

“Because I just know. It won’t help me.” She swallowed, clutching her mug like a lifeline. “Please don’t make me do that, dada.”

There was a brief quiet. And then, “Okay.”

“Okay?”

“Okay.”

Isak was quiet for a long time. Faina knew she looked like shit, knew that he wanted her to talk to him, to tell him what was wrong, like she always used to. But it was so much harder now. Especially when the thing that was wrong was that she had the same pain he had had. Agian. 

So, instead, she closed her eyes and said, “I’m just tired. That’s why this happened. I’m just tired.”

 

“So… are you okay?” Lisa asked two days later, when Faina was back in school. The blonde girl nodded, trying and failing to open her locker. 

Lisa frowned. “Why were you out all this time?”

“Stomach bug,” Faina shrugged.

“Is there one going around?” Lisa asked. 

Faina shrugged again. She knew she looked bad, and that Lisa was worried, but all she had to think about in order to remind herself why she couldn’t open up was that boy touching Lisa’s face. Lisa had somebody new to talk to. 

Laila came up to her later, as they walked to lunch, with a worried frown. “Are you okay? Mama said Sana told her you had a really bad panic attack.”

Smiling slightly, Faina looked down at her hands. “I’m fine. It was just school stress and stuff.”

“Yeah?” Laila asked, tilting her head. 

“Yeah.”

“Okay. Well, I’m here if you want to talk. I’m always here. Okay?” she said, smiling at Faina with worried eyes and pretty dimples. She took the blonde girl’s hand and squeezed it. 

“Thanks, Laila. I know,” Faina said back, and then somebody was laying a hand on her shoulder and turning her around and Lisa was staring at her with a hurt confusion on her face. 

“You had a panic attack?” the red haired girl asked. Faina felt herself seize up, looking down. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

“I didn’t feel like explaining everything to you,” she mumbled, trying to walk away. 

“What? Why- why would you think- how could you not tell me that?” Lisa asked, voice breaking slightly. 

Faina curled her hands into tight fists, tying to focus on the feeling of her fingernails instead of the feeling in her stomach. “You wouldn’t have cared anyway,” she said quietly, trying to make it sound hurtful. Instead it just came out sad. 

“Of course I would have,” Lisa replied, sounding equally sad. She let Faina’s arm down and drew in her eyebrows. “Why would you think that?” 

And then Anne came down the hall with her pretty, happy smile and said, “What are you guys doing? Aren’t you going to lunch?”

Before Lisa could respond, Faina pushed past them both, mumbling something about not being hungry. 

 

The first person she told was Eva. They were sitting at Faina’s house, a few nights later, and Ida, Eden and Aspen were in Aspen’s room, playing with legos or something. Jonas and her dads were coming soon, and they were all going to have dinner together. Faina was sitting at the kitchen table, watching Eva prepare a salad, and she felt like her heart was being ripped out of her chest because she and Lisa hadn’t spoken in four days. 

“Faina? Did you hear me, sweetheart?” Eva said, grabbing Faina’s attention back from where it had drifted. 

“Hmm?” she hummed. 

Frowning, Eva put down the salad bowl and sat down. “Hey. Are you okay? You seem distracted.”

Faina stared at her. She was so tired. Too tired. 

“Did you ever like a girl?” she asked. “Like, romantically?”

At this, Eva’s face softened. “Yeah,” she nodded. “Yeah, I have. I’m bisexual.”

“Really?” Faina asked, surprised. 

“Yeah,” Eva nodded back. She tilted her head. “Why, baby? Do you like a girl?”

Faina’s head felt like lead. Outside, a car drove by and she tensed up, worried it was her dads, but it wasn’t. And then her eyes glassed over, soft and quiet. She closed them. “I can’t.”

“Oh, sweet girl. Why not?” Eva asked, running her thumb over the back of Faina’s knuckles.

The blonde girl’s throat felt like it was closing as she whispered, “I can’t make it harder for them. Everyone would think they turned me gay, everyone would hate them even more and I can’t do that. I can’t hurt them like that. And Eden and Aspen, I can’t make them have gay dads and a gay sister, I can’t let that happen. I just can’t.”

“Hey hey hey,” Eva was saying, standing them both up and hugging around her shoulders. “You’re okay. Everything’s going to be okay. I promise.”

“It’s not,” Faina whispered, shaking. 

Pulling back, Eva tilted Faina’s chin up with one hand and wiped under her eyes with the other. “Listen to me, Faina. Your dads love you so much. And I know you know that, and that you know they will always love you. But you could never, ever hurt them with something like this. I promise you. The world is getting better and better, and I promise that your dads won’t face any pain if you tell them this.”

“I can’t prove everyone who says homophobic stuff about them turning their kids gay right, I just can’t do that-” Faina choked. 

“You are not proving somebody right. You are being yourself. And they didn’t turn you anyway, you are who you are,” Eva said, shaking her head. 

“I know that,” Faina said quickly. “I know. I just…”

Just then, the car pulled up into their driveway and Faina panicked, rubbing under her eyes. “They can’t see me like this.”

“Okay. Okay. Go wash your face, I’ll keep them occupied,” Eva said quickly, and Faina was already moving. 

Later that night, after the dinner, Eva was giving Faina a long hug. “It’s going to be okay, sweet girl,” she whispered. “You’ve got this. Try not to be so scared. You call me whenever you need, okay?”

“Okay,” Faina nodded back. “Thank you.”

 

“Hey,” Lisa said as she sat down, putting her lunch tray on the table across from Faina’s. 

The blonde girl looked down. “Hi.”

“Are you mad at me?” Lisa asked, looking so scared and sad that Faina wanted to cry. 

“No,” she said softly, wringing her hands together. 

“Are you sure?” Lisa asked. “Because you haven’t been- you’ve been so- did I do something?”

“I’m not mad,” Faina said irritably. 

“Because I’m not dating that guy or anything. I would’ve told you if I was dating somebody. We’re just friends, and he kissed me while we were talking, but I told him I don’t wanna date or anything,” Lisa shook your head. “So if you’re mad about that-”

“I’m not mad about that,” Faina shook her head. She saw Karoline and her boyfriend walking towards them and Laila approaching, too, so she took a deep breath and said it. “I was jealous of him.”

And then, just as the others got there, Faina stood up and walked away, trying to forget about the look of shock that had just spread across Lisa’s face. 

 

It had been a Friday, so she didn’t have to see Lisa the next day, which she was glad for. 

Aspen and Eden were at a friend’s birthday, so it was just her and her dads for lunch. “Here, baby girl,” Even said, handing her a bowl of soup as he sat down across from her. 

“Takk,” she said softly, taking it and putting it down on the placemat. 

Isak walked out from their bedroom, and Even put one hand on the side of his waist as they shared a quick kiss. Faina looked down. 

“Hey, sweetheart,” Isak said, walking over and kissing the top of her head. 

“Hi,” she whispered. 

“Baby, did you get milk?” Even asked, opening the fridge. 

“Yeah, it’s on the left,” Isak responded, pouring his own soup.

“Thank you, angel,” Even nodded, taking it out. “You want chocolate milk, Fay?” he asked, using the pet name they only took out sometimes. 

Faina shrugged. “Sure.”

“Okay.”

Even poured the rest of their food before sitting. “What are you doing tomorrow?” he asked Isak, reaching across and lightly threading their fingers together. 

“I don’t think I’m doing anything,” Isak shook his head. 

“Do you wanna come with me to get the new equipment I ordered? It came into the studio. Then we can go out to that lunch place you like,” the blue eyed boy asked, smiling. 

“Ja,” Isak nodded. “That sounds good.”

“It’s a date,” Even nodded back. 

Faina pushed her soup around with her spoon. “Dads?” she asked. 

“Yeah?” they both said, looking at her. 

Faina closed her eyes slightly. “I think I have a crush on Lisa.”

There was a brief quiet, and then the clanking of spoons hitting bowls came back and Isak said. “Okay, baby.”

“Do you wanna talk about it?” Even asked, and when Faina opened her eyes, they both looked completely calm. 

After a beat, she shook her head. “No.”

“Okay,” Even said. “Thank you for telling us, baby.”

Sighing out a shaky breath, the girl nodded. 

 

She wasn’t expecting anyone that night, so Faina had three textbooks out when there was a knock at her door. It was Saturday but she didn’t really like partying, plus she’d been so tired lately, and telling her dads about Lisa had been emotionally draining. So when she heard her pappa opening the door, she assumed it wasn’t for her. 

Rolling onto her stomach, she tried to focus on the next paragraph. Except Lisa hadn’t texted her since she told her she was jealous. And that made her feel like she was dying. 

“Hey, baby girl, Lisa’s here,” Even was suddenly saying, knocking on her bedroom door. 

And the room felt like ice. 

“You awake in there?” she heard Even ask. 

“Yeah,” the girl breathed, and then her door was opening and Lisa was leaning on the frame. 

“You can stay for dinner if you want, Lisa,” Even said as he walked away. 

“Thank you,” the red haired girl called back. And then they were alone. 

“Hey,” Lisa said softly, closing the door behind her. 

Faina sat up, closing her book. “Hi.”

Lisa walked over, sitting on the edge of the bed. She wrang her hands together in her lap. 

“What did you mean?” she asked quietly, not looking at Faina. 

The blonde girl shut her eyes. “I meant I was jealous.”

“Because I was spending time with him? Or because…”

“I was jealous of him like I was jealous of Anders. They way I’ll always be jealous of the boys you like,” Faina said rushedly. 

She could feel Lisa looking at her but couldn’t open her eyes. And then she felt two smooth hands on the sides of her face and tried not to cry. 

She could feel Lisa’s breath on the bridge of her nose as she said, “You don’t have to be jealous anymore.”

And then there were soft, cool lips on hers and Lisa was kissing her. And all that hurt, all that heartache, was suddenly lifted up and out of her. So she kissed Lisa back. 

 

“What do you think they’re doing in there?” Isak asked, getting in bed next to Even. 

“I don’t know,” Even shrugged, playing with the younger boy’s hair.

“Should we let them be in the bedroom with the door closed?” Isak asked, looking up at Even with wide green eyes.

“I think it’s fine, baby. They’re a good kids. They wouldn’t do anything with us right here,” Even said softly, leaning down to kiss the crown of his head. “Whatever’s going on in there is really important to her. Let’s leave them be.”

“Mmmm,” Isak hummed, snuggling closer to him. “You’re so smart.”

Even laughed through his nose. “You’re the genius of Nissen,” he said softly, teasing. 

Isak pushed off the mattress and kissed him lightly. “Shush,” he said. 

Smiling, Even put both hands around his waist. “Love you, baby,” he mumbled. “My little genius.”

Isak hummed and kissed him again. “Love you too, man of my life.”

 

Lisa twisted some of Faina’s hair around one of her fingers. “Faina?” she whispered. 

“Mmm?” the younger girl hummed from where she was laying, head on the taller girl’s chest as they both ignored the Netflix show that was playing. 

“We’re still gonna be best friends, right?”

Smiling, Faina scooted up. “Yeah.”

Lisa smiled back and kissed her for the fourth time. “Do you want to tell people?”

“Our friends. I don’t know about everyone,” Faina replied. “If that’s what you want.”

“Yeah,” Lisa nodded. 

“Okay,” Faina nodded. 

Lisa smiled, reaching down to boop her soft nose, something she’d been doing forever. The little squish. “Okay.”

**Author's Note:**

> Hiii guys!!! I miss you<33 I hope you like this little one-shot<33 please leave feedback lol because I have no idea lol


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